Brobama

A certain British newspaper, which I will not link to, and do not read because of my support for a certain British football club, caught up with one of Barack's little brothers (well, technically half brother). Bernard Obama lives in Kenya where he runs a car parts store, but visits his mother, who lives in the UK, quite often. Bernard and Barack were born of the same Kenyan father, but by different mothers, and didn't actually meet until Bernard was around 17.

It would therefore be difficult to argue that Bernard reflects in any way on his older half-brother - besides, we all know that the Obama is the incarnation of Hope and Change, and cannot therefore be considered anything other than divine.

Bernard is a proud muslim, but we're not supposed to mention that word in the same sentence as His HopeChangefulness, so we'll leave that topic well enough alone. The Brobama is also a devoted Manchester United fan, and avid reader of The Sun*. Now, I could care less about his religion - that's between him and his Maker - but his exceptionally poor choice of football club, and alleged daily reading of such a sorry excuse for journalism is so egregious that it cannot do less than reflect poorly on his illustrious big bro...at least in my book. But then I was already pretty biased against the Obamessiah before I learned his brother was a dirty manc.

*The Sun, which is never to be named in the presence of a Liverpool fan, much less ever purchased or read, is still the subject of a boycott among any well-informed Red. This is due to the inexcusable coverage of the Hillsborough disaster, which claimed the lives of 96 Liverpool FC supporters in 1989. The newspaper's editor ran a completely false and unsubstantiated article on the front page of the rag, claiming that the LFC fans involved in the tragedy participated in horrible acts which will not be given the dignity of having been named on this site. The editor refuses to apologize for this remarkable smear to this day.